The quickest way to piss off a bride if you are one of her many bridesmaids is to lose weight. Once the dresses are ordered and paid for it seems as though it is just the perfect time to sabotage the program. So, they do their best.
This particular bridesmaid had a real “beef” with the bride…the color of the dresses. While I am pinning up 3 layers of chiffon and satin she looks down at me and says,”Everyone knows that redheads don’t look good in pink, look at my pure white porcelain skin, this is not my best color, you would think the bride would have taken this into consideration before she chose the color.” REALLY?
So to make a point, this little chickie decides to drop 20 pounds…just before the wedding in 2 weeks. The alteration involves removing the zipper, as per usual, and taking in the center back seam 5 inches (2.5 inches each side) and re-attaching the zipper. Then I ask, “Are you planning on losing more weight?” and she sheepishly says, “I don’t know”. I say, “well, tell me now as I’m not going to do this alteration twice in 2 weeks.”
She says she got a real good deal on this sample dress, less than half price, but all the beads are all falling off, 3 loops have been trashed and hanging off the back and she somehow has mysteriously lost 20 pounds too. What does this do to the dress? Well, the corset, when laced up now meets in the middle with no spread, not pretty so I have to figure out a way to make this dress narrower so we have that gap in back. The only side seam without encrusted beads is the right side so I can pin 2 inches out. Now, we get a little gap but that actually throws off the center back a lot but the bride only wants the tightness, big bust pads and the portion below her butt taken in so that she cannot possible sit down…OK…nothing new there! Let’s look inside: take in the butt,
The next July bride, one of 8, comes for her second fitting, she arrives 45 minutes late and only thinks to call after I call and leave a message on her cell phone. It seems the hair salon was running late and it never occurred to her to phone me as she was going to miss her 11 am Saturday morning appointment. I never accept clients on Saturday or Sunday as those are my “flat-out sewing days” but I stupidly made an exception.
I ask if she has gained weight and she swears nothing has changed…and when I look around to the front bust area…there is a huge problem…the bride has decided to bring along her own extra set of rubberized gel boobs the size of tennis balls and tuck those behind the already huge bust pads I have sewn in…well, well…adding another 2 inches in front certainly affects the back. I tell her to take those puppies out or she will never get her zipper up and she whines in her baby voice, “I just wanted to look bigger”…yes, bigger but not better. Brides…most live with the boyfriend before the wedding so he knows what the package is before the wedding vows so the extra padding is always to impress the audience and look more like Jessica Rabbit. That darn cartoon character has caused more pain and havoc for seamstresses ever since that movie came out! There are even women who have had plastic surgery to look like her.
As the weather is heating up to the 90’s + I wish you all cool sewing rooms and refreshing drinks and backyards filled with zucchini plants!